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William Janis's avatar

Any thoughts on the recent film called "Materialists" about the wealthy in New York City?

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David Roberts's avatar

I haven’t seen it yet. Waiting for it to be streamed.

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William Janis's avatar

I read a review in the Washington Post. The film is apparently very transactional.

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William Janis's avatar

Private secondary and university institutions serve as the training ground for the ruling class.

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William Janis's avatar

Thanks. I thought that I might be stepping on toes. I made this comment based on my son graduating from Yale.

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William Janis's avatar

Once upon a time, I wished that I could live in Ridgefield, CT.

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William Janis's avatar

The other place was Leitchfield, CT. I do not know why.

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Isabel Cowles Murphy's avatar

where I grew up!

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William Janis's avatar

Has Samuel read the 2024 John Grisham book called Framed? I am listening to the audio version.

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William Janis's avatar

Isabel--good comment about selecting an appropriate spouse.

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William Janis's avatar

I do not understand the flying private thing. Would not business class, or even first class, prove sufficient?

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David Roberts's avatar

It does suffice, but it’s a big status thing.

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William Janis's avatar

I still do not understand the reasoning.

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William Janis's avatar

Like the term, "a fragile path to happiness."

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William Janis's avatar

Parents' influence over their children rapidly diminishes over time starting from the birth of the children.

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William Janis's avatar

Isabel highlights the concept of parents living their lives through the lives of their children.

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Isabel Cowles Murphy's avatar

I see a whole lot of that, I'm afraid. I also wonder if I'll continue to be so relaxed about getting 'status' from my children's accomplishments as they grow older. It's easy for me to be laid back when they are still young and their self-actualization remains pure potentiality.

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William Janis's avatar

The parents are paying the elite high schools to get their kids into elite universities.

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Jonathan Brownson's avatar

Second gilded age...

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Jonathan Brownson's avatar

I am embarrassed to say that I had not heard that term before...it is a helpful term for those historians like me who a "lumpers" rather than "splitters".

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Jennifer Ward Dudley's avatar

David. Another live chat . I missed . Love reruns. Didn’t disappoint . Isabel was comfortable with you. As if you’d been friends for along time. My Beverly Hill’s childhood friend’s parents were amongst the wealthiest in the Country . I am one of 6 daughters . Our father a film director, producer. His office on Rodeo Dr where Harry Winston lives now. He tried to keep up with the Joneses . Our home was comfortable while my friends. Holmby Hiils, BelAir, above Sunset. I was as comfortable in theirs as mine. We were teenagers in mid 60’s. Equals in a land of plenty . I moved to NYC when 21. Again my crowd. Old , blue blood . Same in Greenwich where I rented a cottage on an estate in Zaccheus Mead. Married in 1980. Darien Ct. My aunts home. Contentment Isle. My husband . Finance. Hard worker. Big pockets !?.. nope. Built a fine family. Moved Cincinnati. Talk about old wealth ? Surrounded. Tooo conservative . Goes with mid west territory. We discovered a beautiful lake harbor 8 hours up. One of my buddys family . Quaker Oats. Seems I attract the upper one half of one percent. 3 of my sisters, we Roman Catholic , married successful”nice “ Jewish wealthy men. I ? Nice, Catholic boy from O H I O by way of Cornell. 47 years . We “invested “

Your continued success on Substack . Deserved. As well as your success in life.

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David Roberts's avatar

Thank you Jennifer. I always like reading about your life and appreciate the kind words and encouragement.

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Jennifer Ward Dudley's avatar

Our son and daughter were raised with some privileges never entitled ! Honor and humility were impressed . Some of my sisters adult children work but …. Spoiled ?! Hard pill for me to swallow . Keep getting the message out not all kids from “lucky gene pool” are lacking gratitude

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Amber Trimble's avatar

What if it's not that deep and most people just wanna be around people like them? Whether that's socioeconomic status, race, etc.

Practically speaking, you likely aren't vacationing or going to dinner with less privileged people unless you're picking up the tab.

And just like there's a code among the wealthy there are codes with: other classes, race, religion.

See, "they ain't like us-Kendrick Lamar"

As far as education goes, I do think an equalizer and interesting approach is self-directed education. There are no grades which removes that aspect of competition and kids can pursue what they love.

I worked for a powerful, billionaire family as their nanny out of college. It was a tremendous culture shock for me.

Long story short, I left feeling like, "I'd rather eat ramen with friends in Austin than continue being in this world in Dallas."

They were nice enough and definitely one of the chiller rich families. It just wasn't my world.

Maybe this is one of the disadvantages of wealth...you ain't like us? 😉

Thanks for the intriguing conversation y'all! I'll be thinking about this for awhile.

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Isabel Cowles Murphy's avatar

I think about that a lot. I myself am neither ultra wealthy nor famous, but I happen to know a number of folks who are, and their social experience seems to always end up narrow to the point of isolationism. It's important to me to be able to ride the subway with my jaw hanging open, staring at people and taking notes. I don't ever want to question someone's motivations for being my friend. Some people give up those luxuries. And those are privileges lost, in my opinion.

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Amber Trimble's avatar

I thought more about this and considered "the church" as a solution to class division. I've experienced this in different church settings. Members bring their highly valued gifts (not limited to $$) share meals, serve together, kids go to the same summer camp, etc.

I was lower class growing up and there was always some anonymous kind church member who would pay for me and other kids who couldn't pay so we'd be able to participate with the group.

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David Roberts's avatar

I think “the church” can gather different people together.

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Isabel Cowles Murphy's avatar

David I’m curious—do you feel you’re able to move about the world with relative freedom and non-suspicion? I get the sense that you do, and I’d love to know how you manage that.

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David Roberts's avatar

Do you mean I'm non-suspicious of the world?

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Isabel Cowles Murphy's avatar

Yes, or more specifically, of others’ motivations in your company.

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