Fire Ready Aim is a common thing in many arenas of personal and professional life.. Yes, time teaches by failure that reconsideration is a mark of maturing.
Great post David, and to answer your question, yes. I have decided not to publish a post a handful of times. Usually for the reason you gave here. It only adds to the anger.
Challenging decision I would think, particularly in light of the work that went into the article you intended to release. I have been a bit torn by the debates taking place and have tried to stay on the sidelines, focusing instead on the small corner of substack where my passion resides. Thanks for sharing about that Jewish tradition. I was unfamiliar with that and found it interesting and enlightening. All the best David!
It is so hard to scrap something we’ve worked on, and I commend your restraint. Whether you are a lamedvavnik (sp?) or not, this is the kind of analysis that the world depends on. I’m sure your thoughts are deeply considered and intelligent (and thus of value) but putting some deliberate quiet into the noise machine is maybe the best thing any of us can do.
I have a number of pieces which I feel passionately about, but I have not posted. It seems like they are waiting for an event to trigger their significance. (I had a post on Telemachus that sat in limbo forever until I read someone's very personal piece about his divorce. I felt like a bird called from across the river and I my piece served as a refrain.) I have been reading the responses to Nazis/free speech issue just like everyone else, but I have not responded despite having my own opinions. Your post, which I greatly appreciate, hinges on the definition of "censorship" and I guess my quibble would be that it is not the most precise word for what you are describing. Rather, I think you are exercising what I, as a Catholic, would call Prudence. From Wikipedia: Prudence (Latin: prudentia, contracted from providentia meaning "seeing ahead, sagacity") is the ability to govern and discipline oneself by the use of reason. For a bit more context, I married into a Jewish tradition (the Liss in Gomez-Liss is from my Polish-Jewish FIL) and I love so many Yiddish terms like lamedvavniks. It is righteous to try to live as a good person who doesn't want or expect recognition. I truly believe that the world is saved by such people. I think I know one who died in her 40s who is the model of my own motherhood. She was good through her grace and sacrifice, and we who write should be good through our writing. The art of writing is a sacrifice of our time and energies. And writing includes deciding what we choose not to publish. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. It gave me quite a bit to think about.
Email, or writing in general (as opposed to live interaction) affords us time to think and choose our words and sometimes that extra time serves as the pause need, to realize we are writing in anger and that anger may not serve us well. Of course, there have been times when I have not hit send. Sometimes I save a draft to be revisited and revised and sometimes I just delete it. The challenge is greater, in impromptu conversation, but there is no rule against taking a moment to think before opening our mouths. It is a generally good idea and the world would, indeed, be a better place if we all reflected, even for just a moment, before we spoke or hit send. But I will hit post now without a moment's thought.
I don't think I've ever got so far as to have something ready to publish when I've changed my mind, but there are things I've gotten part way through.
I've made a promise to myself that I'm going to be authentic in this newsletter and I'm not going to write opinions I don't truly hold in order to appease or virtue signal or whatever this and that. But that doesn't mean I have to say everything that comes into my head. And there are topics on which I do hold opinions, even firm opinions, but I do not feel that I am the person to say those things. Like a lack of a type of qualification, I guess? I don't THINK I would horribly disappoint people with my opinions but I still prefer to let people who are better off saying the things say the things.
I'm still working on this, so it may not be my final analysis. My basic assumption is that people need to get used to the emotion of anger and learn not to be triggered by it.
I grew up in a family where nothing upsetting was allowed to be said. My parents provided very well for us in everything but emotions. It was their opinion that everything that went on under our roof was at least okay, so that no objection or dissent was legitimate. Then add on top of that, the fact that society still discourages and penalizes anger in women.
Anger is an extremely valuable emotion. It is the recognition that something is wrong and needs to be changed. The most mature form of anger is calm but implacable determination. This kind of anger does not need to bash anyone, but it will not rest until it reaches its goal. This kind of anger can also be realistic— it can evaluate goals as either achievable, partly achievable, or absolutely not achievable. It can rationally choose what direction this energy should go.
Anger is frustrated desire. It's the energy that keeps us moving toward a goal when there are obstacles in the way. There are some extreme forms of brain damage that remove a person's ability to want things. This becomes extremely crippling, because the person has no emotional impetus to move toward any goal. They can sit and think about what they might possibly want, and never take any action.
I am an emotional person who tends to want a lot of things. I tend to solve problems quickly, And these quick solutions often tend to work poorly. Fortunately, because I live alone, these "solutions" tend to affect no one but me. I find myself generating one or two of these quickie non solutions, before I calmly sit myself down and say, "Let's think about what might actually work.'
Anger is the energy that moves us toward goals. I think it is a lot more benign than the emotion of fear, which can cause us to overreact so easily.
Hmmm. That leads to the question of whether making some people angry as a cost of making other people think is a saintly move. One could equally argue that the saintly move is to accept the anger of others because suppressing what you see to be the truth is the worse alternative. I don't think anyone would argue that the situation in Gaza is beyond ghastly--the disagreement comes in assigning responsibility for the situation and determining what each side needs to do now. I see no way to hash out those emotionally fraught issues without inciting anger. The second, of course, is the only one that matters now but there can be no resolution of that one without dragging in the first. Also, one could argue that Jews have both survived and thrived because they refused to suppress what they thought to be the truth. Mixing religions, it needs to be borne in mind that many who achieved sainthood did so because they sacrificed themselves to that very conviction.
Fire Ready Aim is a common thing in many arenas of personal and professional life.. Yes, time teaches by failure that reconsideration is a mark of maturing.
Carpenter's wisdom applies here. Measure twice. Cut once.
Great post David, and to answer your question, yes. I have decided not to publish a post a handful of times. Usually for the reason you gave here. It only adds to the anger.
Teillhard de Chardin would also approve. Better to squelch the wrong thought than release it into the noosphere, where it will circulate endlessly.
Challenging decision I would think, particularly in light of the work that went into the article you intended to release. I have been a bit torn by the debates taking place and have tried to stay on the sidelines, focusing instead on the small corner of substack where my passion resides. Thanks for sharing about that Jewish tradition. I was unfamiliar with that and found it interesting and enlightening. All the best David!
It is so hard to scrap something we’ve worked on, and I commend your restraint. Whether you are a lamedvavnik (sp?) or not, this is the kind of analysis that the world depends on. I’m sure your thoughts are deeply considered and intelligent (and thus of value) but putting some deliberate quiet into the noise machine is maybe the best thing any of us can do.
yet 700 times more likely than winning Powerball®️
Thanks for this post. It's reminding me to add The Last of The Just to my 2024 book list. I hope you're printing out hard-copies of your work.
Yes. Many. And like Mr. Truman, "Some of the best letters I ever wrote, were the ones I never sent."
I have a number of pieces which I feel passionately about, but I have not posted. It seems like they are waiting for an event to trigger their significance. (I had a post on Telemachus that sat in limbo forever until I read someone's very personal piece about his divorce. I felt like a bird called from across the river and I my piece served as a refrain.) I have been reading the responses to Nazis/free speech issue just like everyone else, but I have not responded despite having my own opinions. Your post, which I greatly appreciate, hinges on the definition of "censorship" and I guess my quibble would be that it is not the most precise word for what you are describing. Rather, I think you are exercising what I, as a Catholic, would call Prudence. From Wikipedia: Prudence (Latin: prudentia, contracted from providentia meaning "seeing ahead, sagacity") is the ability to govern and discipline oneself by the use of reason. For a bit more context, I married into a Jewish tradition (the Liss in Gomez-Liss is from my Polish-Jewish FIL) and I love so many Yiddish terms like lamedvavniks. It is righteous to try to live as a good person who doesn't want or expect recognition. I truly believe that the world is saved by such people. I think I know one who died in her 40s who is the model of my own motherhood. She was good through her grace and sacrifice, and we who write should be good through our writing. The art of writing is a sacrifice of our time and energies. And writing includes deciding what we choose not to publish. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. It gave me quite a bit to think about.
Email, or writing in general (as opposed to live interaction) affords us time to think and choose our words and sometimes that extra time serves as the pause need, to realize we are writing in anger and that anger may not serve us well. Of course, there have been times when I have not hit send. Sometimes I save a draft to be revisited and revised and sometimes I just delete it. The challenge is greater, in impromptu conversation, but there is no rule against taking a moment to think before opening our mouths. It is a generally good idea and the world would, indeed, be a better place if we all reflected, even for just a moment, before we spoke or hit send. But I will hit post now without a moment's thought.
I don't think I've ever got so far as to have something ready to publish when I've changed my mind, but there are things I've gotten part way through.
I've made a promise to myself that I'm going to be authentic in this newsletter and I'm not going to write opinions I don't truly hold in order to appease or virtue signal or whatever this and that. But that doesn't mean I have to say everything that comes into my head. And there are topics on which I do hold opinions, even firm opinions, but I do not feel that I am the person to say those things. Like a lack of a type of qualification, I guess? I don't THINK I would horribly disappoint people with my opinions but I still prefer to let people who are better off saying the things say the things.
I'm still working on this, so it may not be my final analysis. My basic assumption is that people need to get used to the emotion of anger and learn not to be triggered by it.
I grew up in a family where nothing upsetting was allowed to be said. My parents provided very well for us in everything but emotions. It was their opinion that everything that went on under our roof was at least okay, so that no objection or dissent was legitimate. Then add on top of that, the fact that society still discourages and penalizes anger in women.
Anger is an extremely valuable emotion. It is the recognition that something is wrong and needs to be changed. The most mature form of anger is calm but implacable determination. This kind of anger does not need to bash anyone, but it will not rest until it reaches its goal. This kind of anger can also be realistic— it can evaluate goals as either achievable, partly achievable, or absolutely not achievable. It can rationally choose what direction this energy should go.
Anger is frustrated desire. It's the energy that keeps us moving toward a goal when there are obstacles in the way. There are some extreme forms of brain damage that remove a person's ability to want things. This becomes extremely crippling, because the person has no emotional impetus to move toward any goal. They can sit and think about what they might possibly want, and never take any action.
I am an emotional person who tends to want a lot of things. I tend to solve problems quickly, And these quick solutions often tend to work poorly. Fortunately, because I live alone, these "solutions" tend to affect no one but me. I find myself generating one or two of these quickie non solutions, before I calmly sit myself down and say, "Let's think about what might actually work.'
Anger is the energy that moves us toward goals. I think it is a lot more benign than the emotion of fear, which can cause us to overreact so easily.
Hmmm. That leads to the question of whether making some people angry as a cost of making other people think is a saintly move. One could equally argue that the saintly move is to accept the anger of others because suppressing what you see to be the truth is the worse alternative. I don't think anyone would argue that the situation in Gaza is beyond ghastly--the disagreement comes in assigning responsibility for the situation and determining what each side needs to do now. I see no way to hash out those emotionally fraught issues without inciting anger. The second, of course, is the only one that matters now but there can be no resolution of that one without dragging in the first. Also, one could argue that Jews have both survived and thrived because they refused to suppress what they thought to be the truth. Mixing religions, it needs to be borne in mind that many who achieved sainthood did so because they sacrificed themselves to that very conviction.
We seem to be exploring the wisdom of restraint, without taking into account the sometimes terrible price of silence.